Tuesday, 8 April 2014

Chapter 39: James Franco & The Gripes of Internet Dating

I'm sure you have all heard the news about James Franco from last week and his flirtation with a 17 year old girl from Scotland via Instagram. The pair met when the girl, Lucy Clode, went to see his Broadway show, Of Mice and Men and Lucy took an Instagram video of him signing autographs to which he said, "You gotta tag me in that." Lucy did and moments later, James Franco messages her asking to meet her at her hotel and even suggested booking a room, even though he knew she was 17. Of course this has caused a lot of
controversy and Lucy is not of age and well, to our knowledge she turned him down (which is crazy to me, 'cause he's obviously a major babe). I have to admit though, I am a little bit in love with the bloke ever since this situation occurred. I thought he was a good looking actor before, but since following him on Instagram he really is quite hilarious and he does soooo much more than acting. He's an artist, a teacher, a writer, a director AND  a model; there just aren't enough hours in the day for Mr. James Franco. Not only that, but he went on the show, 'LIVE with Kelly and Michael', to discuss the whole scandal. The conversation went like this:

Michael: We understand that you have been in the news this morning and it's something that you wanted to address, so...

James: Well I mean, I just didn't, you know, I'm just feeling awkward you know I didn't wanna come on the show and just... feel awkward, so err... yeah I mean I guess, you know I'm embarrassed. I guess I'm just a model of how social media is tricky. You know it's a way people meet each other today. But what I've learned I guess just 'cause I'm new to it, it's like, you don't know who's on the other end. You know, you meet someone in person and you know, you get a feel from them but you don't know who you're talking to and you know... so I used bad judgement and I've learned my lesson. But unfortunately in my position, I have a very good life, but not only do I have to go through the embarrassing kind of rituals of meeting someone, sometimes if I do that, then it gets published for the world so now it's like doubly embarrassing, but, anyway.

Kelly: Well I think the way you came out here and handled it is perfectly acceptable, it happens to everybody and I think it happens to, er, movie stars on a much grander scale like you just said because everybody knows who you are and I promise I will not reveal our text messages...

James: Thank you!

Obviously, Kelly was lying (I hope she was. Not that I have a shot in hell but...). The thing is James is right, it is very hard to meet someone today which is why a lot of people do result to the Internet. You can potentially be whoever you want to be with a screen and a keyboard in front of you. It is obviously very hard for a person of his status as like he said, it is published for the world to see. I'm sure people in that industry would appreciate some privacy as it is a luxury everyone should be entitled to. You can go ahead and say, 'oh but if you want to be famous, that's the cost you have to pay.' Let's not be bitchy now. If you have a talent and it results in you being famous, great, but surely you'd like to at least take a dump in private. Maybe I'm veering away from the point... anyway!

Since being single, I have enjoyed having the time to myself. In particular I'm thoroughly enjoying getting into new programmes and staying in of a weekend (snore). However a few of my friends have recommended I go on dating websites because it is a good way to meet new people and it is "fun". I use that term loosely, as I didn't particularly find it fun when I was on them. I went on Tinder for a week and it was nothing but cheesy lines and blokes that basically were full of dull, boring chat. Oddly some blokes found it strange how I was into films and had a good knowledge on them and a love for writing. It must be very rare these days to find a girl that likes to use their brain guys? Or are you just fulfilling my idea of what I already think of you? AKA, you're only on these sites to get your leg over. Safe to say I deleted that account after a week. I then went on, Plenty of Fish (also known as POF) and this turned out to be even worse. Until one guy popped up and started chatting to me with what I found to be an unconventional starting conversation. Saying how I shouldn't be on this dating site and that there were loads of weirdo's on there, to which I said there can be lots of weirdos on nights out as well. He saw my point. After experiencing the site for 24 hours, I deleted it (there's a pattern going on here) but I continued to talk to this one guy through text as we exchanged numbers - let's call him John for the purpose of this blog and his own privacy. John was a good deal older than me, but he seemed nice so I gave him the benefit of the doubt and went on a date with him. I was very nervous... I drove, he got a taxi. I had two half shandy's, he had 6 pints, I drove him home. Now, from your point of view, do the roles appear to have reversed a bit? I haven't dated for a while, but I was expecting him to maybe pick me up and have a civilised evening rather than a bender? Anyways, I dropped him home and the awkward moment of saying goodbye was drawing near. I said I had a good night (it was average) he reciprocated with the same response, but with a stare that felt like it was lasting an eternity. Was he actually expecting a kiss from me? I kissed him on the cheek, he kissed mine, and then he gave me ANOTHER longing stare (you're not getting a snog mate, take the hint!). SO, when I got home, I text to say I had a nice evening and that it was nice to meet him, he text the following morning saying the same. I didn't reply. The next day whilst I was at work, I felt he thought the date went a lot better than what I thought, but I had to be honest and tell him how I felt. I thought he was a nice enough guy, but I wasn't really looking for anything (which was what I established in the beginning and no, this doesn't mean I'm just looking for your definition of "fun", men). He was very nice and understanding, but I couldn't help but feel really bad about the situation.

The following week I had a message from my friend with an image attached. It was a picture of John at our local pub saying, "Is this your date?" I said, "Yeah it is." She said how he was alone at the bar drinking which was when I started to feel even worse. Poor John all alone at the bar... "Oh no." Said my friend, "spoke to soon. A blonde lady has just met him and they're now hidden away in a corner." I laughed... hard. How dare I feel bad about the whole situation? I was at home at this stage with my friend and we even contemplating going there for dinner. I said no, I'm going to play a little game here... so I text him. I asked how his week had been and you know what he did? He replied an hour and a half later saying he had just woken from a nap. LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE! I ask you all, why lie? I didn't want anything from it anyway, but what was the point in lying? This just confirmed he was on a date because he wouldn't have felt the need to lie otherwise. He could have still said, "Oh I'm at the pub, you had a good week?". UGH. So the texting continued... "Oh no, sorry to wake you, hope you're not working too hard. I've just been to the pub with my friends." FYI he knows where he was is my local pub... poor form on his part. He even suggested this as a date to me and I even told him no because it's my local and I go there enough (sometimes you like a different scene). However, my little 'I'm going to get you shaking in your boots' text did not work as he avoided what I said. In the next text I even said I went to the pub he was in. Again, this didn't phase him.

So... it is safe to say I have learned my lesson as well as Franco. You just don't know who is on the other end when you speak to people on the internet. Don't get me wrong, I know many people who have met over the internet and even got married, which is great for them! But I just don't have the patience for it, ESPECIALLY if they're going to lie which is soooo incredibly easy to do with a screen in front of you. So guys, from now on I will meet men the old fashioned way - face-to-face. In turn I would like to think men will take a leaf out of Justin Timberlake's book who said this week of meeting his now wife, Jessica Biel:

"There was nothing starry about the way we got together. I did it the old fashioned way - by telephone. That's something I learned from both my stepdad and my grandfather - that there is a thing called chivalry and it doesn't have to die with the birth of the Internet. The way  I see it, if you;re asking a girl out on a date, it's only right to do it in a way that she can hear your voice. I had to be pretty persistent in order to get her to say yes. But, if I want something I stick to it. And in the end she agreed." 

You can read more celebrity hook up stories by clicking here and if I do decide to go back on the Internet, I will have a body like Cameron Diaz, legs like Gisele Bundchen and an ass like J-Lo.

James Franco, I salute you! Keep us smiling with your funny and uplifting Instagram posts! If you all have an opinion on this weeks blog you KNOW I love to here them. Just message me on here, Facebook or Twitter (@triciabaxter)

I'll finish this off with a bit of Disclosure - White Noise.

Much love,

P.S. Thank you all SO much for donating to mine and my sister's Race for Life page. We appreciate all of the support so much! We will be running this race in memory of our beautiful Mammy, for everyone else who has lost someone to Cancer and for all the Cancer sufferers out there who are fighting a great battle. If you still haven't donated and would like to, please visit out page at www.justgiving.com/jennys-girls. Thank you! Xxx

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