Tuesday, 2 June 2015

Chapter 87: "So Why Are You Single?"

So... Why are you single? The dreaded question that about 99.9% of singletons get asked. Do we have the answer for you? No. No we don't. How can we possibly answer that fucking question? I went out last weekend with my friend and my sister. My sister is engaged so she was trying to scout for nice men for me and Shak... Some blokes come along, one of which says:

Bloke: I see you're not married. So do you have a boyfriend?
Me: No.
Bloke: So why are you single?
Me: I don't know?...
Friend: She hasn't found the right bloke.
Bloke: Why are you single?
Friend: I haven't found the right bloke.
Bloke: But you're both gorgeous, have beautiful smiles... you must be psychos.

That was his explanation; we must be single because we are psychos. He was clearly (I hope) being sarcastic... but that is the generalisation that most men seem to give these days. I would just like to say on behalf of all women - we are not. But in all fairness, the generalisation us women give for men that are single, is that they have commitment issues. Say what you will fellas, but I think we may need to get rid of these stigmas and really come to terms with why we are all single. So the next time someone asks me this on a night out, at a wedding, at a family do,  I will say (and so should all of you) the following:

I am single because: I like to hog my own Netflix account and watch anything I want without having to wait on someone to watch it with.

I am single because: I want to be able to burp and fart without initial judgement, only for someone to have to accept it after 5 years of being together - you either deal with it or fuck off.

I am single because: I grind my teeth in my sleep. No? Just me then.

I am single because: I like my own company too much.

I am single because: Wine/beer gets me more than a man/woman.

I am single because: Not sure I can fit having a partner into my busy schedule...

I am single because: Everytime I'm in a relationship and it's going bad (which it usually does) I wish I was single.

I am single because: I'm too independent.

I am single: Because men/women are pricks.

I am single because: I want to be.

So... You see really when someone asks why you're single, don't take it personally... a lot of the time the person asking is either:
  1. Nosey.
  2. Genuinely concerned and want to see you happy with someone (this applies to family/friends only).
  3. Want to get their leg over.
  4. Unhappy in their own relationship and wishes they were single too.
What are your thoughts single people? How do you feel when people ask you this question? Do you feel invaded? Or do you feel flattered? Either or, let me know on the back of here, visit my Facebook page or tweet me @triciabaxter.

I will leave you with this little number for now:

P.S. My sister & I are doing our Race for Life THIS SUNDAY! Please help us reach our target of £200 by donating to the following link: https://www.justgiving.com/patriciabaxter
We will be running for our beautiful angel, our Mammy, Jenny Baxter - the bravest woman and the biggest fighter we will ever know. We will also be running for everyone else who is fighting cancer and all of their families affected xxx.


No comments:

Post a Comment